For Parents

Sending your child off to boarding school raises all sorts of important questions for your child. After all, she is a teenager. Leaving home is a major step for kids going off to college, much less a kid going off in ninth or tenth grade to boarding school. And those college kids are four and five years older than she is. So be patient and proactive. Anticipate her questions and concerns. What I strongly recommend is that you try to think about what your child's questions and concerns will be. You know her like the back of your hand anyway.

Almost all the schools on your shortlist will have websites that can answer most of her questions. For answers to her remaining or more detailed questions, email the admissions offices. They will be very happy to help.

So, what's the food like? Food is important to teenagers. As it should be. Truth is that boarding schools have dealt with teenagers for years. They understand the kind of nutrition growing bodies need. Indeed teaching students about nutrition is something boarding schools have baked into their programs.

Here is an example of what I mean from the website for St. Timothy's School, Stevenson, Maryland.

Great food and excellent service are the hallmarks of Dining Services at St. Timothy’s School. We meet the wide range of tastes and meal preferences of our student body with healthy, varied, and wholesome meals. Many items are made from scratch, and homemade pastries

This article offers answers to some of the more common concerns we parents have when our child goes off to boarding school. Most, but not all, of these questions and their answers come from my own personal experience.

1. Your child is expelled?

Expulsion is a big deal. You will have much explaining to do when applying to another private school. It may just be that you will have to send your child to public school for the rest of the academic year while you try to find a new school willing to take her. I have always taken the view that it is how we handle failure which is the true measure of our character. Shall we learn from our mistakes and be the success we know we can be? Or do we blame others and retreat from reality? I suspect some counseling for you and your child might also be helpful.

2. Your child is asked not to return?

Your child attends a boarding school on a year-by-year basis. You and the school sign a new contract every year in April or thereabouts. You will have already had a couple of meetings with the school before being informed that the school has decided that they do not wish to have your child back. Read the warning signs carefully and act accordingly.

3. Your contract is not renewed?

With boarding school teachers in mind, I slipped this question and its answer in. Your contract is most likely

Do you realize that there are still nineteen states in which corporal punishment of students is still allowed? Merriam-Webster defines corporal punishment as "punishment that involves hitting someone: physical punishment." Yes, it is legal to discipline students by hitting them in states in the South, the Southwest, and Midwest, including Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Colorado, Florida, Georgia, Idaho, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, North Carolina, South Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, and Wyoming. It is legal to paddle students with a wooden paddle; while it was much worse ten or twenty years ago, it is appalling that in the 21st century, the wealthiest nation in the world still has nineteen states that permit a child to be spanked by an adult in a classroom. Corporal punishment has no place in schools.

Fortunately, I know no boarding school anywhere in North America permits hitting students. Period. Technically, New Jersey and Iowa are the only states where corporate punishment is forbidden in private schools. But our boarding schools, indeed our private schools as a whole, are enlightened exemplars of all that is good in education. Our private school Codes of Discipline and Conduct do not allow any form of physical abuse. For all kinds of good reasons. Most importantly, our boarding schools understand what is required to create a better world. In this world, children can mature into productive adults who are competent and confident in achieving whatever their dreams are. Corporal punishment is not part of

When I was a youngster, sometime around Victoria Day weekend my parents moved the family out to a cottage near the village of Chateauguay on the banks of Lac St. Louis. We were there until Labor Day. (In those days school opened after Labor Day.) My brothers and sister and I enjoyed swimming and sailing lessons, the occasional dance as we got older, and the usual organized summer activities. Dad worked in Montreal and came out to the cottage in the evenings. Mother stayed at home and supervised us.

When we were bringing up our daughters, it was a bit trickier. We both worked. We had to find things for them to do, both to keep them occupied and to keep them from getting into mischief. A trip, a keyboarding course, and even some tutoring helped make those long summer days in Connecticut move along at a good clip.

Nowadays depending on where you live and the plans you have for your child's education, you have a variety of options to choose from. Let's look at some of them.

Day Camp

Basically, the idea behind a day camp is that you drop your children off in the morning and pick them up in the afternoon. The routine is similar to what you had when school was in session. The advantage to a day camp is that it is usually a local operation. If you are lucky enough to have an established day camp in your area and your children are

One of our parental prerogatives is to worry about our children. That's probably because your child never came with an instruction manual and as a result, you have had to learn so many things about parenting simply by being a parent. No matter, worry is part of the parental landscape. Now, if you are thinking about sending your child off to boarding school, your worries will be quite specific. Probably along the lines of the following questions.

Many parents find the concept of sending a child to boarding school upsetting; a child's adolescence is such a distinctively affective period that entrusting it to others seems wrong. Yet boarding schools prosper, successors to institutions dating to medieval times. Source: Forbes.com

Will my child be safe?

Boarding schools take your child's safety very seriously. Contractually a boarding school functions in loco parentis which is a legal way of stating that the school acts in the place of the parent when it comes to supervision of its students, your child included.

Here is an overview of Pomfret School in Pomfret, Connecticut.

In many respects, your child is a whole lot safer at school where she cannot drive or go to somebody's house and get into who-knows-what. Drugs, drinking, and smoking are not permitted in a boarding school. Zero tolerance is the rule. Does it prevent teens from pushing the limits and experimenting? That's impossible,